attitude

i have to begin this post, in the shadow of that loaded title, with a wee bit of a disclaimer:

i invited said attitude.
i raised him to be independent, and strong.
i encouraged him to use his big personality, to be "noticed" (in a good way ...)
i reveled in his rich, full-of-gusto approach to life.

i did.

however,
(this is the part that i dispell any preconceived notion that I KNEW WHAT THE HELL I WAS DOING WHEN I BEGAN THE ABOVE PROCESS)

i was not planning on the sass. i was not planning on the determination of red-head will (who knew about THAT?!) i was not, and i repeat, n.o.t. expecting it to actually work.

good maude.

much of this is stemming from the teacher thing at school, still. it has not mushroomed any further than the last time i mentioned it, it is just so clearly affecting his attitude. he doesn't have any of this "sass" on days she is not in and he has a substitute (happened yesterday - "oh, mom, the sub was AWESOME - she is so nice, she gave us time to be creative, and show her, and gave me high fives for my work!" who knew that positive feedback worked for 9 year old boys ... amazing!) he is full of it on days that they've butted horns, or he's not been a complete quiet mouse in the room - not many of those - it is so evident that she isn't commending his good work. he was the only one to get ANY spelling words correct on the test - actually he got them ALL correct, and no one else did! and we got nothing home. NOTHING. we found this out from another parent days after the spelling test. argh .. there's more, but that's that ...

and then there's the inherent competitiveness he seems unwilling to temper. first in all things, this kid needs to be. on the bus, to brush teeth, to take a shower, to be done with homework ... all of it. his sister is not a big fan of that when it affects her. she isn't competitive at all, but if he is insisting on being first for let's say, a Wii tournament, well, she isn't all that forgiving- especially if he's been first for the last "1200 turns". there've been some heated discussions, and often it's ended by me, turning it off. and that's met with a wee bit of grief, as you can imagine.

he is spreading his wings. he is testing the battle zone. he is doing this because ... well, because he can.

i am so glad i am 40 now, 'cause you know what - one of my presents to me was patience. that and the security that with patience comes maintenance of already very low blood pressure. the alternative is not appealing. so, i will prevail in this attitude from this 9 year old redhead. he is a mere 9 years old, afterall.

and i taught him everything he knows.

see, my fault.