Yes, I am back ... it was a wonderful trip. Chicago is a beautiful city. Although each time I have been there, it was for business with a little bit of pleasure .... this time was no different.
We had a half day meeting Monday and were surprised with a Cubs baseball game -THAT was fun! :O) And then All day meetings Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, each filled with so much info my head is STILL spinning. We had great dinners, and plenty of cocktails ... and loads of conversation. There was such a corporate mucki-muck though, and that gets heavy. I was d.o.n.e by Thursday night. Happy to fly home Friday morning ..... right back into some stress here. {sigh}
My little K-star, the little lady of the house, is challenging me right now. She is so bossy, so attitude-y and such a demanding little pint sized version of a beotch. It's awful. But it's also everything she will be as an adult (well, okay minus the beotch, I hope ....) but it's hard. I am frustrated, and sad all at the same time. She and I are butting horns, and butting heads. I am disturbed by it. :-(
C-man has an ear infection, and was awake for pretty much the night last night in pain. He hasn't done that in YEARS. So, that was a bit of a tidal wave that hit us last night. We felt the fatigue all day today after a l-o-n-g opening day at baseball yesterday, and then a sleepless night for our 12 hour-sleep boy . ergh.
I am stressed from some other stuff, minor, but still feeling the burdon of the "stuff" just the same .... and feeling like I can't get out of my way, or even ahead lately.
I know the addage - "this too, shall pass" and it will, I know ..... I'm feeling out of sorts though. Not the even keel, move along nicely Karin that I am.
{sigh}
so, how's that for a first blog after a week away .....
*this too, shall pass*
g'night.
Sunday, April 30, 2006
Friday, April 21, 2006
Spring Break week has come to a close ....
And we actually survived~ ! :o)
Really, it wasn't that hard to survive. The kids had a BALL. They were and ARE absolutely exhausted from the fun, and the activity and the friends visiting, and enjoying each other. Lots of play dates, loads of outdoor play (couldn't have asked for a better week weather-wise) and loads of energetic run around 'til you drop kind of play. I even had a ball!
Had to work a few days, but they were really great working days, as I closed a BIG order worth a few bucks, and that made the 'ole boss one happy guy. :o)
Heading to Chicago on Monday for my third phase of training, three nights, and I am looking forward to it. I don't want to be away from the kids and S, but sometimes a break is good for everyone. In addition, I am really proud of my work the last few months, so I feel confident going into the training. I am looking forward to all that I can learn as well. There will be some really talented people at the training, and some very successful comrades, so I am looking forward to seeing them too.
So, yah, here I am Friday evening. House is quiet, kids are sleeping, husband watching the Sox, and I am content. Had loads of people here for dinner, brother, sil, 2 kids, mom & dad, neighbors and their three kids. Had our first summer time dinner of burgers and dogs, and mac salad. I'm ready for it. :o) Bring on the summer. Let the kids out of school, let's play!
okay, really .... not *just* yet, they'd go nuts with this long of a break .... but I'd vote for May 31as the last day of school .... seems fair, yes?
I'll be back this weekend .... smile!
Really, it wasn't that hard to survive. The kids had a BALL. They were and ARE absolutely exhausted from the fun, and the activity and the friends visiting, and enjoying each other. Lots of play dates, loads of outdoor play (couldn't have asked for a better week weather-wise) and loads of energetic run around 'til you drop kind of play. I even had a ball!
Had to work a few days, but they were really great working days, as I closed a BIG order worth a few bucks, and that made the 'ole boss one happy guy. :o)
Heading to Chicago on Monday for my third phase of training, three nights, and I am looking forward to it. I don't want to be away from the kids and S, but sometimes a break is good for everyone. In addition, I am really proud of my work the last few months, so I feel confident going into the training. I am looking forward to all that I can learn as well. There will be some really talented people at the training, and some very successful comrades, so I am looking forward to seeing them too.
So, yah, here I am Friday evening. House is quiet, kids are sleeping, husband watching the Sox, and I am content. Had loads of people here for dinner, brother, sil, 2 kids, mom & dad, neighbors and their three kids. Had our first summer time dinner of burgers and dogs, and mac salad. I'm ready for it. :o) Bring on the summer. Let the kids out of school, let's play!
okay, really .... not *just* yet, they'd go nuts with this long of a break .... but I'd vote for May 31as the last day of school .... seems fair, yes?
I'll be back this weekend .... smile!
Sunday, April 16, 2006
A week has gone by?
Wow, that was a fassssssssst week!
Sometimes, the days blend together for me. Sometimes, I have to stop and think about which day it *feels* like. This week, Sunday crept up on me.
{sigh} and that's a bummer, because that then means Monday is the next day. And this week, the kids are on vacation, and I am not. Each year I have said I was going to take time when they take time for spring break. For some reason, we didn't do it. I think, in the end, it's a good thing, though because I am heading out to Chicago next Monday for a few days. So, if I had taken this week off, and next week out of town, I would feel quite disconnected to work. ;-)
So, today was Easter. We had everyone here, the neighborhood egg hunt commenced at 9:41AM, and concluded at 9:54AM. :o) 10 kids, 300-350 eggs, and lots of energy, and excitement! Then we had appetizers, and lunch/dinner at 2:00. A very large, very lengthy baseball game ensued following, and that was a blast! It became 7:00PM before my eyes, and the kids were exhausted, for sure.
We also did loads of yard prep yesterday. My dear mom pulled many, many of her plants from her yard (they are selling and she wants to keep the older , sentimental plants from her dad in her family ...) and transplanted them here. Our yard is going to be gorgeous! It is SUCH a work in progress for sure, but she has such an eye for it. I am looking forward to the summer months with it all in bloom. :o)
So, alas, another Sunday evening. Some bills paid, the house is quiet, and I am ready to watch my one show a week - Grey's Anatomy. I actually have a book I need to finish too, as I picked up my new just rec'd new book - The Dance of The Dissident Daughter - and am anxious to read that .... oooo, decision, decisions .... :o)
So, off I go, and ready to start a new week -- NOT. Wish I had a clock-slower for the weekend. ;0)
Happy Sunday evening, and Easter too .....
Sometimes, the days blend together for me. Sometimes, I have to stop and think about which day it *feels* like. This week, Sunday crept up on me.
{sigh} and that's a bummer, because that then means Monday is the next day. And this week, the kids are on vacation, and I am not. Each year I have said I was going to take time when they take time for spring break. For some reason, we didn't do it. I think, in the end, it's a good thing, though because I am heading out to Chicago next Monday for a few days. So, if I had taken this week off, and next week out of town, I would feel quite disconnected to work. ;-)
So, today was Easter. We had everyone here, the neighborhood egg hunt commenced at 9:41AM, and concluded at 9:54AM. :o) 10 kids, 300-350 eggs, and lots of energy, and excitement! Then we had appetizers, and lunch/dinner at 2:00. A very large, very lengthy baseball game ensued following, and that was a blast! It became 7:00PM before my eyes, and the kids were exhausted, for sure.
We also did loads of yard prep yesterday. My dear mom pulled many, many of her plants from her yard (they are selling and she wants to keep the older , sentimental plants from her dad in her family ...) and transplanted them here. Our yard is going to be gorgeous! It is SUCH a work in progress for sure, but she has such an eye for it. I am looking forward to the summer months with it all in bloom. :o)
So, alas, another Sunday evening. Some bills paid, the house is quiet, and I am ready to watch my one show a week - Grey's Anatomy. I actually have a book I need to finish too, as I picked up my new just rec'd new book - The Dance of The Dissident Daughter - and am anxious to read that .... oooo, decision, decisions .... :o)
So, off I go, and ready to start a new week -- NOT. Wish I had a clock-slower for the weekend. ;0)
Happy Sunday evening, and Easter too .....
Monday, April 10, 2006
returned, hockey tournament, and a little lady
So, we've returned, and had a great time.
Saw loads of people that we love dearly, and spent some QT with them. S played golf, socialized, and slipped peacefully into that wonderful arena of the love of his posse. He is a different man with that crew. Relaxed, happy, and really -- at peace. I feel how he feels with them, comfortable, genuinely 'at home'. He adores the memories they have, and cherishes their connection deeply. I need to get him there more often. {mental note: make plans}
My business aspect of the weekend was a very successful one (well, truthfully, as yet to be seen when the orders roll in later .....) but in all, a very positive, and time-well spent marketing weekend. It was good to see my manager, the first time since January.
Back at home C had a hockey tourney this weekend. They played great! It was a collection of a team, several players from three different teams of this season. Some of the play was getting to know the other kids on the ice, and decifering the connection they needed to make. In general, they clicked, obviously. S and I missed 2 games, and there were 4 total. They made it to the final championship game, and lost. :o( The team they played we were told, was all 8 going on 9 year olds, and ours was all 8's , a couple of 7's and a 6 year old. It really does make a difference. But they played very well, and C played awesome. He had a great tourney with some assists, and several shots on net. He was thrilled to be there, but, as expected very sad not to win "the whole thing" as he said. However, with a little discussion, he is comfortable with kowing they played reallllllly well.
The little gal, K, just this weekend appeared to me to be about 3 years older when I got home. :o( For some reason, she was just grown up. :o( She and I were chattering on about the goings on this weekend, and she just seemed like she was 8. {sigh} It happens to me often, when I am away, and upon my return, it's as if I am reminded that that time is gone forever - and *this* is what happens when time moves on without me.
So this morning, she wanted to take an Easter Egg that was made last year of plaster, and decorated by her, to school for show-and-tell. The rule is in Kindergarten that they need to write a sentence about the s-a-t item. So she sits, with the egg, and writes this (exactly as she wrote it) : " I have an Eastr egg that I made last yer with my gramma and my brothr. It has pink dekerasons (decorations) on it." Not too bad, I thought ~ for 5! Holy cow, reading and writing has taken off! The she says, "mommy, I'm going to hold this on the bus like a baby, because it's very fragile, and I need to protect it". :o)
Wow, my little lady.
So, here I am readying to clean the piles off the desk, and return to the land of normal.
It's good to be home. At least here, I can slow the hands of time a little better.
Have a great Monday!
Saw loads of people that we love dearly, and spent some QT with them. S played golf, socialized, and slipped peacefully into that wonderful arena of the love of his posse. He is a different man with that crew. Relaxed, happy, and really -- at peace. I feel how he feels with them, comfortable, genuinely 'at home'. He adores the memories they have, and cherishes their connection deeply. I need to get him there more often. {mental note: make plans}
My business aspect of the weekend was a very successful one (well, truthfully, as yet to be seen when the orders roll in later .....) but in all, a very positive, and time-well spent marketing weekend. It was good to see my manager, the first time since January.
Back at home C had a hockey tourney this weekend. They played great! It was a collection of a team, several players from three different teams of this season. Some of the play was getting to know the other kids on the ice, and decifering the connection they needed to make. In general, they clicked, obviously. S and I missed 2 games, and there were 4 total. They made it to the final championship game, and lost. :o( The team they played we were told, was all 8 going on 9 year olds, and ours was all 8's , a couple of 7's and a 6 year old. It really does make a difference. But they played very well, and C played awesome. He had a great tourney with some assists, and several shots on net. He was thrilled to be there, but, as expected very sad not to win "the whole thing" as he said. However, with a little discussion, he is comfortable with kowing they played reallllllly well.
The little gal, K, just this weekend appeared to me to be about 3 years older when I got home. :o( For some reason, she was just grown up. :o( She and I were chattering on about the goings on this weekend, and she just seemed like she was 8. {sigh} It happens to me often, when I am away, and upon my return, it's as if I am reminded that that time is gone forever - and *this* is what happens when time moves on without me.
So this morning, she wanted to take an Easter Egg that was made last year of plaster, and decorated by her, to school for show-and-tell. The rule is in Kindergarten that they need to write a sentence about the s-a-t item. So she sits, with the egg, and writes this (exactly as she wrote it) : " I have an Eastr egg that I made last yer with my gramma and my brothr. It has pink dekerasons (decorations) on it." Not too bad, I thought ~ for 5! Holy cow, reading and writing has taken off! The she says, "mommy, I'm going to hold this on the bus like a baby, because it's very fragile, and I need to protect it". :o)
Wow, my little lady.
So, here I am readying to clean the piles off the desk, and return to the land of normal.
It's good to be home. At least here, I can slow the hands of time a little better.
Have a great Monday!
Friday, April 07, 2006
A little time away
S and I are heading out of town today for a little get-away. It is a little bit of work, for both of us, and a little bit of reprieve. I am so excited to have some alone time with him. :o)
The kiddies are hanging with my parents for 2 days, and they are thrilled! (and that always makes me feel 110% better .....)
So, have a great weekend .... and we'll see you Sunday evening!
The kiddies are hanging with my parents for 2 days, and they are thrilled! (and that always makes me feel 110% better .....)
So, have a great weekend .... and we'll see you Sunday evening!
Wednesday, April 05, 2006
When angels drop into your life.....
..... you get spoiled.
we were spoiled the last few months. we had an angel taking care of our little K-gal.
our sitter, Kelly, is wonderful. she is happy, and fun, and creative, and attentive, and accomodating, and trustworthy, and warm, and solid, and friendly, and kind ......
she's also leaving us.
{sniff, sniff}
I completely understand. her "full time" job (she was only with us part time for K in half day kinder, until the summer started, then she was going to take both squirts) is at a day care center, and she was working close to 30 hours there, without benefits. they called, and lost a staff member, and asked her to fill that spot. with benefits.
I can't blame her. that logical side of me fully understands, and that's what I told her, of course ... that selfish side wants to cover my eyes ....
and cry.
I know why they want her there. the woman is an angel.
just last week I asked her "how heaven was doing without one of their prize angels?" she just laughed ...
she always laughs "-) ...
let's face it, the fight was an unfair battle. we can't compete with benefits for a 22 year old.
although I'd like to think with the charm factor, we won. hands down {work with me, here, I'm wounded ....}
and K, my little K-gal got really, really sad when I told her.
Kelly, you see, was *all hers*. she only had to share her for 3 days with C during the last several months. every other day, Kelly was here to cater, love, nurture, giggle with, dance with, and play with K-gal ~ one - on - one.
so, I am feeling spoiled, and very, very fortunate for the presence of this angel ... but very sad that this angel is leaving us.
\and I have to hunt for a new sitter
maybe heaven will send a new angel to take care of my "angels in training".
:o)
we were spoiled the last few months. we had an angel taking care of our little K-gal.
our sitter, Kelly, is wonderful. she is happy, and fun, and creative, and attentive, and accomodating, and trustworthy, and warm, and solid, and friendly, and kind ......
she's also leaving us.
{sniff, sniff}
I completely understand. her "full time" job (she was only with us part time for K in half day kinder, until the summer started, then she was going to take both squirts) is at a day care center, and she was working close to 30 hours there, without benefits. they called, and lost a staff member, and asked her to fill that spot. with benefits.
I can't blame her. that logical side of me fully understands, and that's what I told her, of course ... that selfish side wants to cover my eyes ....
and cry.
I know why they want her there. the woman is an angel.
just last week I asked her "how heaven was doing without one of their prize angels?" she just laughed ...
she always laughs "-) ...
let's face it, the fight was an unfair battle. we can't compete with benefits for a 22 year old.
although I'd like to think with the charm factor, we won. hands down {work with me, here, I'm wounded ....}
and K, my little K-gal got really, really sad when I told her.
Kelly, you see, was *all hers*. she only had to share her for 3 days with C during the last several months. every other day, Kelly was here to cater, love, nurture, giggle with, dance with, and play with K-gal ~ one - on - one.
so, I am feeling spoiled, and very, very fortunate for the presence of this angel ... but very sad that this angel is leaving us.
\and I have to hunt for a new sitter
maybe heaven will send a new angel to take care of my "angels in training".
:o)
Tuesday, April 04, 2006
babies, babies, everywhere .....
I have been to the mom's and babe's hospital here twice in the last week.
To visit two new babies that have entered my life. Lucky, lucky me! (a DEFINITE "want to", for sure! Such a better day here today! :o)
One babe was a girl, Ruby. A wee little thing ... 6lbs, 2 oz.
And one was a boy, Samson, to be called Sam, a wee bigger at 8lbs, 4 oz.
OOOOOOOO .... baby snuggles, baby coos, baby faces, baby toes, baby, baby, baby. :o) Love it. It's so nice to share in their joy, and see the pride in their faces. It is a miracle each time I witness the splendor of the creation. It realllllly is. And I marvel at the prospect of our shared *title* ~ mom.
I got pangs for sure. However, this time, the pangs were logical. As if there was that angel sitting on my shoulder, filing her nails and saying "but you're out of the woods, dear .... are you sure you want to go back?!" She was a loud angel. She was audible in my ear. She was very logical.
And the *other* angel on the other shoulder was cooing and ahhh-ing with me at the splendor in front of me. The smell of the new babe, the tender heart, the magical moments that lie ahead ....the *other* angel said "oh, yes, you are so not done." She was whispering, and speaking gently, and cooing .... she wasn't logical. She spoke with my heart.
Such a conundrum. Such an impass. The pros, the cons. There are many .....
To visit two new babies that have entered my life. Lucky, lucky me! (a DEFINITE "want to", for sure! Such a better day here today! :o)
One babe was a girl, Ruby. A wee little thing ... 6lbs, 2 oz.
And one was a boy, Samson, to be called Sam, a wee bigger at 8lbs, 4 oz.
OOOOOOOO .... baby snuggles, baby coos, baby faces, baby toes, baby, baby, baby. :o) Love it. It's so nice to share in their joy, and see the pride in their faces. It is a miracle each time I witness the splendor of the creation. It realllllly is. And I marvel at the prospect of our shared *title* ~ mom.
I got pangs for sure. However, this time, the pangs were logical. As if there was that angel sitting on my shoulder, filing her nails and saying "but you're out of the woods, dear .... are you sure you want to go back?!" She was a loud angel. She was audible in my ear. She was very logical.
And the *other* angel on the other shoulder was cooing and ahhh-ing with me at the splendor in front of me. The smell of the new babe, the tender heart, the magical moments that lie ahead ....the *other* angel said "oh, yes, you are so not done." She was whispering, and speaking gently, and cooing .... she wasn't logical. She spoke with my heart.
Such a conundrum. Such an impass. The pros, the cons. There are many .....
Monday, April 03, 2006
Patience
why is it that someone gets ALL of it, and someone else gets NONE?
Doesn't seem fair.
I think that I was given about an ounce. Okay, maybe an ounce and a tablespoon.
I want a gallon.
Really.
I had a frustrating day today. And I lost my patience at 8:00PM with C who was an innocent bystander to the frustration. That sucks. I felt awful, and apologized, but I still feel like the weight of the bad-mommy-award is sitting on my shoulders. :-(
It wasn't even any ONE thing that frustrated the hell out of me, it was several *things* that needed to be done. NOW. And that got me down, and irritated. I was busy with the have to's and the need to's; and the want to's were juuuuuuuuust beyond the reach of my fingertips. I couldn't get them. I couldn't even tip toe over to them and hang on to them.
Well, one I did. K and I decorated for Easter today. Took us all of 40 minutes. :o) And ... good news, our vriendin, Fransie (remember the wonderful Dutch lady that sent us *love* across the ocean?) we got all those fantabulously beautiful, and precious Easter decorations on the branches in the vases of sugar water.
weeeeeeeeeeee! That was fun, and definitely a "want to" {so why am I complaining, right? well, that was truly the only one today ..... and I have been up since 6:00AM that's why.} .... but I am planning on some photos so you all can see them too, and I think you'll think they look terrific, too! (or at least you'll tell me that ;o)
And right now, I am working. I was so good last year with this late at night working crap. So good. I turned off the work computer at 8:30/9:00, "the rest will wait until tomorrow" kind of attitude. Felt great, and even better, I found scrapping with all my free time. I felt like I was spending quality time with hobbies, and such. Now, things have changed a bit with work, the need to be more organized, and better prepared the next day is more essential, and truthfully necessary (coupled with the fact that always leads to more sales = more money, so hard to fight this here .....) in addition, I am one year deeper into the position, and one year deeper into the relationships with folks at hospitals = better/more communication in emails, and internet work, so now I work longer hours after the squirts are sleeping. That means: less time for scrapping (SO behind, not even funny) and less time unwinding. {I am procrastinating some detail work that is due to my boss with the blog entry here .... so this might bite me too .....drag}
And this all means: more frustration on my part because I have to put off the WANT TO's, which leads to short patience. See the evil cycle? ergh.
I need to let it go. I need to unwind, and find some patience. It's not even that I am unhappy with anything. Quite frankly, I love my job. I love our life. I am working out (thank god for that - can you IMAGINE if I was penting all that inside, not releasing?! aiy aiy aiy) I love my kids, I love my husband. I love want to's. I love the spring that is bounding in rapidly.
I loathe have to's. I have very very little patience for them.
I think tomorrow when I get home and C gets home, K, C and I are going to do a want to. Each of us will choose a want to, and complete it.
I am going to have a picnic with my kids in the afternoon. It may be an inside picnic due to rain, but dagnabbit, I am doing a want to tomorrow. And I want to have a picnic. Heck, I may even start the day with a want to.
I want to have more patience with ___________. Really, ALL of it.
Doesn't seem fair.
I think that I was given about an ounce. Okay, maybe an ounce and a tablespoon.
I want a gallon.
Really.
I had a frustrating day today. And I lost my patience at 8:00PM with C who was an innocent bystander to the frustration. That sucks. I felt awful, and apologized, but I still feel like the weight of the bad-mommy-award is sitting on my shoulders. :-(
It wasn't even any ONE thing that frustrated the hell out of me, it was several *things* that needed to be done. NOW. And that got me down, and irritated. I was busy with the have to's and the need to's; and the want to's were juuuuuuuuust beyond the reach of my fingertips. I couldn't get them. I couldn't even tip toe over to them and hang on to them.
Well, one I did. K and I decorated for Easter today. Took us all of 40 minutes. :o) And ... good news, our vriendin, Fransie (remember the wonderful Dutch lady that sent us *love* across the ocean?) we got all those fantabulously beautiful, and precious Easter decorations on the branches in the vases of sugar water.
weeeeeeeeeeee! That was fun, and definitely a "want to" {so why am I complaining, right? well, that was truly the only one today ..... and I have been up since 6:00AM that's why.} .... but I am planning on some photos so you all can see them too, and I think you'll think they look terrific, too! (or at least you'll tell me that ;o)
And right now, I am working. I was so good last year with this late at night working crap. So good. I turned off the work computer at 8:30/9:00, "the rest will wait until tomorrow" kind of attitude. Felt great, and even better, I found scrapping with all my free time. I felt like I was spending quality time with hobbies, and such. Now, things have changed a bit with work, the need to be more organized, and better prepared the next day is more essential, and truthfully necessary (coupled with the fact that always leads to more sales = more money, so hard to fight this here .....) in addition, I am one year deeper into the position, and one year deeper into the relationships with folks at hospitals = better/more communication in emails, and internet work, so now I work longer hours after the squirts are sleeping. That means: less time for scrapping (SO behind, not even funny) and less time unwinding. {I am procrastinating some detail work that is due to my boss with the blog entry here .... so this might bite me too .....drag}
And this all means: more frustration on my part because I have to put off the WANT TO's, which leads to short patience. See the evil cycle? ergh.
I need to let it go. I need to unwind, and find some patience. It's not even that I am unhappy with anything. Quite frankly, I love my job. I love our life. I am working out (thank god for that - can you IMAGINE if I was penting all that inside, not releasing?! aiy aiy aiy) I love my kids, I love my husband. I love want to's. I love the spring that is bounding in rapidly.
I loathe have to's. I have very very little patience for them.
I think tomorrow when I get home and C gets home, K, C and I are going to do a want to. Each of us will choose a want to, and complete it.
I am going to have a picnic with my kids in the afternoon. It may be an inside picnic due to rain, but dagnabbit, I am doing a want to tomorrow. And I want to have a picnic. Heck, I may even start the day with a want to.
I want to have more patience with ___________. Really, ALL of it.
Saturday, April 01, 2006
There's a new blogger in 'da house .....
and she's a real clown!
:O)
Check her out at "all I ever wanted" in my links .... :o)
{woohoo, sistah' sledge, glad you could join the fun!}
:O)
Check her out at "all I ever wanted" in my links .... :o)
{woohoo, sistah' sledge, glad you could join the fun!}
Friday, March 31, 2006
so fortunate
I am.
I have written about it before.
I am so lucky to have:
a family that is healthy
a family that is beautiful
a family that loves one another, and in turn loves me
friends with which to share life
friends to share my family
life to live
tonight we had some friends and some family over. It was a mixed reason for sure. Some family needed to forget what they are going through, and just dive into that forgetfulness. Some friends needed to continue the bond of friendship with us. I love these friends. I love the bond they are forming with us. I love the family members. I love that we can just be.
It was a good night. One of many in the days to come with the spring and the summer rapidly decending on us.
I wish there was more time to just be.
I have written about it before.
I am so lucky to have:
a family that is healthy
a family that is beautiful
a family that loves one another, and in turn loves me
friends with which to share life
friends to share my family
life to live
tonight we had some friends and some family over. It was a mixed reason for sure. Some family needed to forget what they are going through, and just dive into that forgetfulness. Some friends needed to continue the bond of friendship with us. I love these friends. I love the bond they are forming with us. I love the family members. I love that we can just be.
It was a good night. One of many in the days to come with the spring and the summer rapidly decending on us.
I wish there was more time to just be.
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
vriendin
I have a very dear one of these .... she's Dutch. And that word means friend in Dutch. :o)
My vriendin, Fransie, has sent love a long way across the ocean. She has shared her traditions with my family.
A package arrived today, full of beautiful, delicate, warm-up-your-home-and-heart, spring colored decorated items to be hung on Easter branches in my house. The same kinds of decorations that she has in her home right now. I now have them here .... ready to brighten the room, the air, and the spirit for Easter.
All the way from Holland. :O)
This vriendin, is a true gem. She is one of the neatest ladies I have ever met. She is kind, and giving, and a wonderful addition to my life.
Thanks, vriendin, we loved the surprise gift of love! I promise a picture of the gifts ....
*smooch*
;o)
My vriendin, Fransie, has sent love a long way across the ocean. She has shared her traditions with my family.
A package arrived today, full of beautiful, delicate, warm-up-your-home-and-heart, spring colored decorated items to be hung on Easter branches in my house. The same kinds of decorations that she has in her home right now. I now have them here .... ready to brighten the room, the air, and the spirit for Easter.
All the way from Holland. :O)
This vriendin, is a true gem. She is one of the neatest ladies I have ever met. She is kind, and giving, and a wonderful addition to my life.
Thanks, vriendin, we loved the surprise gift of love! I promise a picture of the gifts ....
*smooch*
;o)
Monday, March 27, 2006
Monday, Monday
Have you ever felt like you were looking in on your life at yourself, and you were someone new?
I had that experience today. I am one of the room moms for my little gal's (who is feeling better, a little upset tummy still, but no vomitting) Kindergarten class, and we had K registration today for incoming students. I was asked to be there for the event, and greet/socialize to make the new moms and dads feel welcome to the school.
As I stood there, I was "lifted up" and looked down and myself, and my friends that were there. I was in the middle of recalling me there as a new mom with C, and then with K the next year, and for some odd reason, I was looking in on that as an outsider. As if it was happening to someone else, and I didn't live it. It was familiar, but not closely. It wasn't a long period of time that passed, but it was long enough for me to think I was dreaming the whole thing. It was surreal.
I cannot grasp the fact that my kids are now another year older. 1st grade? 2nd grade? What happened?
I was reading a freinds blog and she was commenting on the fact that she has turned a pivotal corner, and has the "right to enjoy being a mum". Hmmm ... is that an amazing statement? She watched a show, and learned that it is a right to do just that - find joy with being a mum. I so agree. I always have, and truthfully, pride myself in the fact that I wholeheartedly jump into motherhood - I think I was destined to be where I am right now. But enjoying it of late has been challenging. The have to's, the need to's, the sibling stress, the growing family stresses, the busy schedules.... on and on. It's not the kids I don't enjoy, it's the superfluous stuff that has attached itself to the weight of the fun of it, and brought it tumbling down. I will heed that advice she has, I will. I will enjoy the title, the responsibility, the beauty, the love, the time, and the schedule. It is life after all, and we will get what we put into it.
My kids are wonderful little people. They are so fun to be around, they ooze personality. They attract people that want to be with them, they make friends easily, they are polite, they are social creatures, and they are terrific. I am proud. A pride that bursts everyday. I need to remember that, and like that friend said, appreciate when a compliment is thrown your way about how "well-behaved your kids are". Say thanks, not "heh. you should see them at home!"
K is certainly tapping into her independence, and flexing her 'tude muscles - well, darnit, I taught her that. I should revel in the fact that she listened. I need to contain the 'tude here and there, for sure, but for the most part, she is woman - hear her roar. She is proud, and loving, and tender with her brother. She is the other woman of the house here, and she takes her position seriously.
C is energetic, and fun-loving, and silly, with a spirit that is unbridled. He is un-pissoffable. He is happy to be alive, and shows it everyday. He thinks that life consists of hockey, pb&j or pb&fluff, hockey, strawberry milk, mac&cheese, hockey, baseball, basketball, hockey, reading, PlayStation and hockey. He can cross the line, and flex his muscles too, generally with me. Dang it, taught him too, I should revel in that, too.
I want to be around them, I love having them as my companions, and my kids. I love that we are a family with the inner strength to be unafraid to live. I love that we are a bonded union, one with similar goals, and aspirations. I love that together, we enjoy one another.
I need to enjoy more, though. Much more.
I don't think this is a burden. In fact, I am anxious to start. :o)
But C & S are at a Bruins Game, and K is sound asleep upstairs. So, off I am to write my goals for tomorrow and I will begin with :
Enjoy.
I had that experience today. I am one of the room moms for my little gal's (who is feeling better, a little upset tummy still, but no vomitting) Kindergarten class, and we had K registration today for incoming students. I was asked to be there for the event, and greet/socialize to make the new moms and dads feel welcome to the school.
As I stood there, I was "lifted up" and looked down and myself, and my friends that were there. I was in the middle of recalling me there as a new mom with C, and then with K the next year, and for some odd reason, I was looking in on that as an outsider. As if it was happening to someone else, and I didn't live it. It was familiar, but not closely. It wasn't a long period of time that passed, but it was long enough for me to think I was dreaming the whole thing. It was surreal.
I cannot grasp the fact that my kids are now another year older. 1st grade? 2nd grade? What happened?
I was reading a freinds blog and she was commenting on the fact that she has turned a pivotal corner, and has the "right to enjoy being a mum". Hmmm ... is that an amazing statement? She watched a show, and learned that it is a right to do just that - find joy with being a mum. I so agree. I always have, and truthfully, pride myself in the fact that I wholeheartedly jump into motherhood - I think I was destined to be where I am right now. But enjoying it of late has been challenging. The have to's, the need to's, the sibling stress, the growing family stresses, the busy schedules.... on and on. It's not the kids I don't enjoy, it's the superfluous stuff that has attached itself to the weight of the fun of it, and brought it tumbling down. I will heed that advice she has, I will. I will enjoy the title, the responsibility, the beauty, the love, the time, and the schedule. It is life after all, and we will get what we put into it.
My kids are wonderful little people. They are so fun to be around, they ooze personality. They attract people that want to be with them, they make friends easily, they are polite, they are social creatures, and they are terrific. I am proud. A pride that bursts everyday. I need to remember that, and like that friend said, appreciate when a compliment is thrown your way about how "well-behaved your kids are". Say thanks, not "heh. you should see them at home!"
K is certainly tapping into her independence, and flexing her 'tude muscles - well, darnit, I taught her that. I should revel in the fact that she listened. I need to contain the 'tude here and there, for sure, but for the most part, she is woman - hear her roar. She is proud, and loving, and tender with her brother. She is the other woman of the house here, and she takes her position seriously.
C is energetic, and fun-loving, and silly, with a spirit that is unbridled. He is un-pissoffable. He is happy to be alive, and shows it everyday. He thinks that life consists of hockey, pb&j or pb&fluff, hockey, strawberry milk, mac&cheese, hockey, baseball, basketball, hockey, reading, PlayStation and hockey. He can cross the line, and flex his muscles too, generally with me. Dang it, taught him too, I should revel in that, too.
I want to be around them, I love having them as my companions, and my kids. I love that we are a family with the inner strength to be unafraid to live. I love that we are a bonded union, one with similar goals, and aspirations. I love that together, we enjoy one another.
I need to enjoy more, though. Much more.
I don't think this is a burden. In fact, I am anxious to start. :o)
But C & S are at a Bruins Game, and K is sound asleep upstairs. So, off I am to write my goals for tomorrow and I will begin with :
Enjoy.
Saturday, March 25, 2006
BoBo
The dog that makes you go hmmmmmmmmm .......
So, we're dog-sitting for my dear old uncle who is in Virginia training for a really cool new intell position with the government, and his little friend, BoBo, is with us for the weekend.
Beautiful dog, appears to have a sweet disposition, adorable face, short in stature, and quite colorful. He's 18 months, and a Cocker Spaniel. Brown and off white, with some beige on his backside. It looks like he has a pair of cowboy chaps on the back legs, and he is fluffy, and very soft. His tuft of hair at the top of his head looks like a mohawk, and quite frankly, doesn't "fit" his personality. He is quivery, and jumpy, and very tentative ..... and nervous with kids, and that ultimately makes him untrustworthy to me.
He is very different from our two. Ours are the bomb. They are funny, fun, silly, and friendly. Sometimes TOO friendly, but ever the cool doggies, with personality PLUS. Adore, and I mean to the "inth degree" adore people, especially little people. Even our Cocker, she is not quivery, or nervous. She is bundles of energy, and friendly; the lab is kind, and gentle, and so fun. He is not smart, but that makes him so lovable, just the same. Never once showed a single ounce of aggression. He has been 120 lbs in his lifetime, and now stands a lean, dieted and exercised 85lbs.
BoBo has growled at 4 kids so far.
Since yesterday at 12:00PM. :o(
I have a hard time trusting him because of that, and I keep him close when there are kids around. My two he is fine with, as I think he has adjusted to their presence. He settles down with other kids ultimately, but initially, he is not comfortable, and that shows. Therefore, neither am I. And that bothers me. Especially because my two kids are ultratrusting when it comes to dogs. They know the rules, of course, ask the owner if you may pet the dog, lead with your hand, and let them sniff, then as the dog greets you, you then respond. And in general, I think other kids feel the same way - trusting.
The worst part so far -- he woke me up at 2:30AM with whining, and a "package" on the floor next to my bed (blech) last night, and then proceeded to whine all.night.long. I was up at 6:00AM with only 3 hrs of sleep (went to sleep at 11:30PM). It looked like a train hit me, and S concurred with my lovely physical appearance at 6:00AM (gotta love the rough mornings). I'm a little beat now, and ready for bed, to say the least.
He better not whine tonight. I might have to do something drastic, like put him in the sound-proof garage for the night. I will. It'll be the hardest thing ever, but people, come on, I am human after all, and WAYYYYYY out of sleep deprivation mode.
Add insult to injury, K has been vomitting (her first time ever) ... :O( all day, so I could potentially be in for a very painful night tonight if this rascal causes me grief.
{sigh} this is what badges of courage are formed from right? I can do it ..... I can do it.
pant. pant. huff. huff.
That's what caffeine and couches are for the next day.
Like I said, BoBo is very beautiful, and really a sweet fella by all appearances.
But that little pea better be sleeping tonight.
And my little pea, I hope she feels better tonight.
g'night all.
So, we're dog-sitting for my dear old uncle who is in Virginia training for a really cool new intell position with the government, and his little friend, BoBo, is with us for the weekend.
Beautiful dog, appears to have a sweet disposition, adorable face, short in stature, and quite colorful. He's 18 months, and a Cocker Spaniel. Brown and off white, with some beige on his backside. It looks like he has a pair of cowboy chaps on the back legs, and he is fluffy, and very soft. His tuft of hair at the top of his head looks like a mohawk, and quite frankly, doesn't "fit" his personality. He is quivery, and jumpy, and very tentative ..... and nervous with kids, and that ultimately makes him untrustworthy to me.
He is very different from our two. Ours are the bomb. They are funny, fun, silly, and friendly. Sometimes TOO friendly, but ever the cool doggies, with personality PLUS. Adore, and I mean to the "inth degree" adore people, especially little people. Even our Cocker, she is not quivery, or nervous. She is bundles of energy, and friendly; the lab is kind, and gentle, and so fun. He is not smart, but that makes him so lovable, just the same. Never once showed a single ounce of aggression. He has been 120 lbs in his lifetime, and now stands a lean, dieted and exercised 85lbs.
BoBo has growled at 4 kids so far.
Since yesterday at 12:00PM. :o(
I have a hard time trusting him because of that, and I keep him close when there are kids around. My two he is fine with, as I think he has adjusted to their presence. He settles down with other kids ultimately, but initially, he is not comfortable, and that shows. Therefore, neither am I. And that bothers me. Especially because my two kids are ultratrusting when it comes to dogs. They know the rules, of course, ask the owner if you may pet the dog, lead with your hand, and let them sniff, then as the dog greets you, you then respond. And in general, I think other kids feel the same way - trusting.
The worst part so far -- he woke me up at 2:30AM with whining, and a "package" on the floor next to my bed (blech) last night, and then proceeded to whine all.night.long. I was up at 6:00AM with only 3 hrs of sleep (went to sleep at 11:30PM). It looked like a train hit me, and S concurred with my lovely physical appearance at 6:00AM (gotta love the rough mornings). I'm a little beat now, and ready for bed, to say the least.
He better not whine tonight. I might have to do something drastic, like put him in the sound-proof garage for the night. I will. It'll be the hardest thing ever, but people, come on, I am human after all, and WAYYYYYY out of sleep deprivation mode.
Add insult to injury, K has been vomitting (her first time ever) ... :O( all day, so I could potentially be in for a very painful night tonight if this rascal causes me grief.
{sigh} this is what badges of courage are formed from right? I can do it ..... I can do it.
pant. pant. huff. huff.
That's what caffeine and couches are for the next day.
Like I said, BoBo is very beautiful, and really a sweet fella by all appearances.
But that little pea better be sleeping tonight.
And my little pea, I hope she feels better tonight.
g'night all.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
"Bumpin' Along"
I remember once a patient that I had treated replied to my daily question of "how are you feeling today?" with that - "oh, bumpin' along". And I found it rather humorous. First of all, the patient had undergone a total knee replacement, and had a significant limp to his gait. But he didn't necessarily mean it literally, he was referring to the "bumps" of life.
I think that's where I am in the last couple of weeks. Bumpin'.
Our lives are well, work is going very well, I am still diggin' it. S isn't so thrilled with his current position, however, is extra excited about a business venture he and two buddies have begun. The kidlets are good, flexing their 'tude muscles only minimally.
Hockey is winding down, well, the regular season is. Gymnastics is winding down for the season. Piano is still a favorite. Baseball is beginning, golf is beginning, and we are looking at spring cleaning the yard in the next couple of weeks.
My parents house is still on the market, and they are heavy, very heavy, on my mind.
I'll be 38 tomorrow.
38.
Doesn't that seem so ... adult?
blech.
Idontwannabe38Idontthink.
For the first time, I think EVER, I am not all giddy about my birthday being tomorrow. I'm not sad, or angry. Just not my giddy self.
I love my birthday. My day. All mine.
Well, I used to. Maybe I need to be silly tomorrow.
Yep, that's it. Silly.
alright, I think that's it.
Off to do some more bumpin'.
The weekend's got some good stuff in store, maybe the bumps will become a RIDE. :O)
I think that's where I am in the last couple of weeks. Bumpin'.
Our lives are well, work is going very well, I am still diggin' it. S isn't so thrilled with his current position, however, is extra excited about a business venture he and two buddies have begun. The kidlets are good, flexing their 'tude muscles only minimally.
Hockey is winding down, well, the regular season is. Gymnastics is winding down for the season. Piano is still a favorite. Baseball is beginning, golf is beginning, and we are looking at spring cleaning the yard in the next couple of weeks.
My parents house is still on the market, and they are heavy, very heavy, on my mind.
I'll be 38 tomorrow.
38.
Doesn't that seem so ... adult?
blech.
Idontwannabe38Idontthink.
For the first time, I think EVER, I am not all giddy about my birthday being tomorrow. I'm not sad, or angry. Just not my giddy self.
I love my birthday. My day. All mine.
Well, I used to. Maybe I need to be silly tomorrow.
Yep, that's it. Silly.
alright, I think that's it.
Off to do some more bumpin'.
The weekend's got some good stuff in store, maybe the bumps will become a RIDE. :O)
Monday, March 20, 2006
The Golden Rule
You know it ... "do unto others as you would have others do unto you" Nice Rule. I think, and very, very appropriate for children. yes?
So, at 7 and 5.5 can you grasp that? Said just like that?
I am having a little bit of a struggle with attitude from my squirts, the last week or so. My dear old husband doesn't get the attitude from them. Who said they could snap at me? Who says they can question me?
Who?
{sigh} here's the scene:
K has a play date with a friend, I meet the mommy with K and her friend at school, picking up C and her older child at said school. I haven't seen K since 8:30AM. It's 3:02PM. She zips by, excited to continue to play, and I say "uh, hello there, girly!" She looks at me, dead in the face, and looks away. Uhm, hmmmm, I think .... oh, she must not have really *seen me*.
"HI! Girly!" (a little louder)
K turns, this time with crinkled eyebrows, and then the eye roll begins.....
"hi mom ....I heard you before."
Here's the best part - get ready : she looks away, hand on hip, and then goes on with her play, away from me.
Uh, WHAT?!
I was insulted. I couldn't help it. She's 5. Have I mentioned that? I expected this at 14, maybe 13.
Not 5.
And really, was it the end of the world. No. Was it awful, terribly fresh? No. Did I like to see it? NO. Was I insulted and shocked she ignored the Golden Rule?
Heck yes.
So we began once in the car - address it, discuss it, explain why not .... feel badly, sad, hurt. Golden Rule. Remember?
Later, at home, C is asking about wearing shorts tomorrow. I say, as I have been saying for the last two weeks, "no, C, it's going to be very cold again tomorrow ... not quite shorts weather"( uhm, it's supposed to be a high of 39.) Thinking that would be reasonable to my always-chilly-in-the-AM son, he says "SO!" (insert eye roll)
What?! WHAT?! you too?
ack.
Adress it, discuss, explain. Sad. Golden Rule. blah blah blah.
Then, bedtime comes with the two of them, and I discuss the Golden Rule (again), telling them that I will try my best too, to speak kindly, and be gentle, thinking before I speak, etc etc. (of course, taking responsibility as any mother would for teaching this horrific behavior .... ) and off they go to bed.
They don't remember. They don't think they are snapping. They don't think they have attitude. They are just flexing their muscles. Trying for control.
Excuse,me, kids .... *I* am the controlling one right now. You'll get your turn ~ later. You can choose what snack, what drink to take to school, lunch menu, clothes (within reason, of course) even, which jacket, what hat, which gloves, how to decorate your bed, breakfast food, whcih games to play after school .... but you can't have control JUST because you think it's time to have control. Or can they? Is it all changed now that they are no longer toddlers?
So here I sit. Wondering. Where I have gone wrong? What have I taught them? Is this directly related to speaking sternly to my kids when they needed to be spoken to? Did I go too far when I did? Was I nasty? Did I adhere to the Golden Rule?
"Do unto others as you would have others do unto you".
I think I need to work with this. I think we need to explore this more. There is something to that.
I can learn an awful lot from it too.
The Golden Rule.
So, at 7 and 5.5 can you grasp that? Said just like that?
I am having a little bit of a struggle with attitude from my squirts, the last week or so. My dear old husband doesn't get the attitude from them. Who said they could snap at me? Who says they can question me?
Who?
{sigh} here's the scene:
K has a play date with a friend, I meet the mommy with K and her friend at school, picking up C and her older child at said school. I haven't seen K since 8:30AM. It's 3:02PM. She zips by, excited to continue to play, and I say "uh, hello there, girly!" She looks at me, dead in the face, and looks away. Uhm, hmmmm, I think .... oh, she must not have really *seen me*.
"HI! Girly!" (a little louder)
K turns, this time with crinkled eyebrows, and then the eye roll begins.....
"hi mom ....I heard you before."
Here's the best part - get ready : she looks away, hand on hip, and then goes on with her play, away from me.
Uh, WHAT?!
I was insulted. I couldn't help it. She's 5. Have I mentioned that? I expected this at 14, maybe 13.
Not 5.
And really, was it the end of the world. No. Was it awful, terribly fresh? No. Did I like to see it? NO. Was I insulted and shocked she ignored the Golden Rule?
Heck yes.
So we began once in the car - address it, discuss it, explain why not .... feel badly, sad, hurt. Golden Rule. Remember?
Later, at home, C is asking about wearing shorts tomorrow. I say, as I have been saying for the last two weeks, "no, C, it's going to be very cold again tomorrow ... not quite shorts weather"( uhm, it's supposed to be a high of 39.) Thinking that would be reasonable to my always-chilly-in-the-AM son, he says "SO!" (insert eye roll)
What?! WHAT?! you too?
ack.
Adress it, discuss, explain. Sad. Golden Rule. blah blah blah.
Then, bedtime comes with the two of them, and I discuss the Golden Rule (again), telling them that I will try my best too, to speak kindly, and be gentle, thinking before I speak, etc etc. (of course, taking responsibility as any mother would for teaching this horrific behavior .... ) and off they go to bed.
They don't remember. They don't think they are snapping. They don't think they have attitude. They are just flexing their muscles. Trying for control.
Excuse,me, kids .... *I* am the controlling one right now. You'll get your turn ~ later. You can choose what snack, what drink to take to school, lunch menu, clothes (within reason, of course) even, which jacket, what hat, which gloves, how to decorate your bed, breakfast food, whcih games to play after school .... but you can't have control JUST because you think it's time to have control. Or can they? Is it all changed now that they are no longer toddlers?
So here I sit. Wondering. Where I have gone wrong? What have I taught them? Is this directly related to speaking sternly to my kids when they needed to be spoken to? Did I go too far when I did? Was I nasty? Did I adhere to the Golden Rule?
"Do unto others as you would have others do unto you".
I think I need to work with this. I think we need to explore this more. There is something to that.
I can learn an awful lot from it too.
The Golden Rule.
Friday, March 17, 2006
Happy St. Patrick's Day
Erin Go Bragh ! (which means Ireland Forever!)
Hope all the Irish, and all the Irish-for-a-day, have a wonderful day!
S took the day off, this is, according to him, Christmas, of course. ;O)
Enjoy -- off to have some Shamrock Shakes at K's kind. class, and then some corned beef and beer!
:O)
Hope all the Irish, and all the Irish-for-a-day, have a wonderful day!
S took the day off, this is, according to him, Christmas, of course. ;O)
Enjoy -- off to have some Shamrock Shakes at K's kind. class, and then some corned beef and beer!
:O)
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Time
it is the one thing I feel like I chase. it is the one thing that I seem to watch slip on by. it is the one thing that I want to create more of on a daily basis. it is the one thing I.hate.wasting.
okay, really, I chase more than that, I would love to create a million things on a daily basis, and I hate wasting food, too. but you get my drift right?
Tired, today. 4:30 AM was the time that alarm rang. Rise and shine, off to the OR. ick. That's a time that was not so fun. Once there, loads of fun. Good times. Even after that -- all day, actually. Good times. I love what I do. it's fun, and energetic, and very, very good timing for me, for the fam, and for the lifestyle.
right now, time is aching my bones, though. I feel like it's been three days today. okay, maybe two. but the time has been d-r-a-g-g-i-n-g with a start that early. it is hard to imagine doing that each day. thank goodness it's not everyday quite that early.
it's time for bed. I am exhausted. {yawn}
g'night.
okay, really, I chase more than that, I would love to create a million things on a daily basis, and I hate wasting food, too. but you get my drift right?
Tired, today. 4:30 AM was the time that alarm rang. Rise and shine, off to the OR. ick. That's a time that was not so fun. Once there, loads of fun. Good times. Even after that -- all day, actually. Good times. I love what I do. it's fun, and energetic, and very, very good timing for me, for the fam, and for the lifestyle.
right now, time is aching my bones, though. I feel like it's been three days today. okay, maybe two. but the time has been d-r-a-g-g-i-n-g with a start that early. it is hard to imagine doing that each day. thank goodness it's not everyday quite that early.
it's time for bed. I am exhausted. {yawn}
g'night.
Monday, March 13, 2006
Watching the Pain
Have you ever watched someone you love deal with a pain so big you can't imagine ever feeling what they are feeling?
Have you ever watched someone you love make decisions that you know are among the hardest anyone should ever have to make?
Have you ever hurt for that person, and wanted it all to just go away?
My heart is aching for a very close family member today. My heart is sad for him. He is realizing that his marriage is over. It is less than 10 years old, his marriage, and he is hurting beyond words.
The things they've had to deal with in this short 9+ years are among the worst possible ... number 1 here, burying a child.
He is hurting, he is sad, he is beaten.
He is still in love with her. :o( And likely will be forever.
It is his second marriage. A marriage he swore would never happen, again. Until he met her.
I wish for the pain to end, for the healing to begin, and for the new chapters to be written.
I wish for him peace, and for her, internal rest. I wish for him to be happy again, for her, to let go of the anger, to stop running, and to let it be.
For both, move forward and love again. Both beautiful people. Both full of love. Full of Life.
This thing called life has so many turns, and so many bends. It isn't easy, for sure, but it is an adventure.
I consider myself so lucky. So blessed. I trust I will *always* be that way. But I realize, and recognize that I have to make the effort to stay that way, that it's work that's involved with keeping that. It is a mutual relationship. It has to be.
I wish everyone felt this way.
Have you ever watched someone you love make decisions that you know are among the hardest anyone should ever have to make?
Have you ever hurt for that person, and wanted it all to just go away?
My heart is aching for a very close family member today. My heart is sad for him. He is realizing that his marriage is over. It is less than 10 years old, his marriage, and he is hurting beyond words.
The things they've had to deal with in this short 9+ years are among the worst possible ... number 1 here, burying a child.
He is hurting, he is sad, he is beaten.
He is still in love with her. :o( And likely will be forever.
It is his second marriage. A marriage he swore would never happen, again. Until he met her.
I wish for the pain to end, for the healing to begin, and for the new chapters to be written.
I wish for him peace, and for her, internal rest. I wish for him to be happy again, for her, to let go of the anger, to stop running, and to let it be.
For both, move forward and love again. Both beautiful people. Both full of love. Full of Life.
This thing called life has so many turns, and so many bends. It isn't easy, for sure, but it is an adventure.
I consider myself so lucky. So blessed. I trust I will *always* be that way. But I realize, and recognize that I have to make the effort to stay that way, that it's work that's involved with keeping that. It is a mutual relationship. It has to be.
I wish everyone felt this way.
Saturday, March 11, 2006
"You should see the other three guys!"
...that is the response my little comedian is giving when everyone (and I mean everyone) asks him 'what happened?'
Then, he rolls into laughter, and says "they were huge, but now they're in the hospital!"
:o)
A little levity always helps when you can't see from one eye ......
He is much better ... the pain is far less, the swelling is slightly less, and most importantly, his spirits are high. He still is swollen shut, but the size of the swelling is less, and that makes it appear much better. He slept well, and said he feels "good enough to play outside all day, mommy". :o )
Right now, at this moment, he is rollerblading, after completing a 9 inning baseball game with daddy out front. And last night, he insisted on going to the rink to watch his team have practice, but couldn't resist the temptation to *be in it*, so he went out on the ice, no pads, just helmet, and skates, to skate. He was very happy to be there with his friends. And coach, fabulous, wonderful, amazing, coach J made him feel so good.
Really, he feels much better. Kids are so resilient, aren't they?! Thank goodness .....
It's me that feels awful. Every time I look at him, I have to give him a hug .... he looks so ...different. My poor babe .... I took a picture, of course, and I'll post once I have it.
So, thanks for the check in, girls, you rock! :o)
And Fransie ... oh yes, the peanut butter kiss cookies .... delicious! Here's the recipe:
Heat oven to 375*
Beat together 1/2 Cup shortening, 3/4 cup peanut butter in large bowl until well blended
Add 1/3 cup granulated sugar, and 1/3 cup brown sugar, beat until fluffy
Add 1 egg, 2 Tablespoons milk, and a teaspoon of vanilla, beat well
In separate bowl stir together 1 1/2 cup flour, 1 teaspoon baking soda, and half teaspoon salt. Add gradually to peanut butter mixture, and beat well.
Shape your dough into 1 inch balls, and roll in small pile of granulated sugar in new bowl to coat exterior of balls.
Bake 8-10 minutes or until lightly browned. Take out of oven
Immediately press Hershey's chocolate kisses in center of each cookie. Cookie will crack around the edges.
Remove from hot pan, and cool completely on wire rack.
Makes 4 dozen.
The kids love pressing the kisses, and they always love to stir ingredients with me.
So, when do I get the banana frosting recipe from your cupcakes last weekend?
;-)
Have a great Saturday .....
Then, he rolls into laughter, and says "they were huge, but now they're in the hospital!"
:o)
A little levity always helps when you can't see from one eye ......
He is much better ... the pain is far less, the swelling is slightly less, and most importantly, his spirits are high. He still is swollen shut, but the size of the swelling is less, and that makes it appear much better. He slept well, and said he feels "good enough to play outside all day, mommy". :o )
Right now, at this moment, he is rollerblading, after completing a 9 inning baseball game with daddy out front. And last night, he insisted on going to the rink to watch his team have practice, but couldn't resist the temptation to *be in it*, so he went out on the ice, no pads, just helmet, and skates, to skate. He was very happy to be there with his friends. And coach, fabulous, wonderful, amazing, coach J made him feel so good.
Really, he feels much better. Kids are so resilient, aren't they?! Thank goodness .....
It's me that feels awful. Every time I look at him, I have to give him a hug .... he looks so ...different. My poor babe .... I took a picture, of course, and I'll post once I have it.
So, thanks for the check in, girls, you rock! :o)
And Fransie ... oh yes, the peanut butter kiss cookies .... delicious! Here's the recipe:
Heat oven to 375*
Beat together 1/2 Cup shortening, 3/4 cup peanut butter in large bowl until well blended
Add 1/3 cup granulated sugar, and 1/3 cup brown sugar, beat until fluffy
Add 1 egg, 2 Tablespoons milk, and a teaspoon of vanilla, beat well
In separate bowl stir together 1 1/2 cup flour, 1 teaspoon baking soda, and half teaspoon salt. Add gradually to peanut butter mixture, and beat well.
Shape your dough into 1 inch balls, and roll in small pile of granulated sugar in new bowl to coat exterior of balls.
Bake 8-10 minutes or until lightly browned. Take out of oven
Immediately press Hershey's chocolate kisses in center of each cookie. Cookie will crack around the edges.
Remove from hot pan, and cool completely on wire rack.
Makes 4 dozen.
The kids love pressing the kisses, and they always love to stir ingredients with me.
So, when do I get the banana frosting recipe from your cupcakes last weekend?
;-)
Have a great Saturday .....
Friday, March 10, 2006
Periorbital Cellulitis
Yep. That's what he's got.
The early AM was a tad bit frightening here .... C arrived in our bedroom with a completely swollen shut left eye. He was not happy, to say the least. I was actually quite nervous from the difference between last night and this AM (after reading what it *could* end up becoming). Called the ped - the best thing happened, much to my relief - HIS ped answered the phone. In we went right away .... again, to my relief, and S's, Dr. McG was calm (so not surprising) and felt that is was PERIorbital and his eye itself was fine, good movement, good vision, and the infection looked like it was oral antibiotic ready.
The likely culprit was his own hands .... when he went to the nurse for his "itchy" eye, he was consistently rubbing what was probably nothing. Nerves from the wounded heart probably caused him to perseverate with the scratching of the *nothing* that was there, and he left a germ or two on his skin turning into an infection.
His poor heart. :-(
Back to today ..... so, we went to the pharmacy, got the meds (holy smokes .... these are antibiotics different than what we've seen before! $246.00... thank goodness for prescription and medical insurance, the copay was far, far cheaper!) and we are now home .... C wanted to go to school to say hi to the teacher, grab his spelling quiz so that I could give it to him at home, and turn in his homework. This is his first and only absence from school ever, so not going likely felt odd for sure .....
He saw his posse, and of course, they were very attentive to him - "please C, please stay, dude!" :o) How cute is that? But he didn't want to stay ... so we're hanging out playing some games, and getting ready to make peanut butter kiss cookies.
So, send us your get well vibes, if you have any extra just hanging around ... we'll be hoping that is stays PERIorbital and just goes quickly away ....
The early AM was a tad bit frightening here .... C arrived in our bedroom with a completely swollen shut left eye. He was not happy, to say the least. I was actually quite nervous from the difference between last night and this AM (after reading what it *could* end up becoming). Called the ped - the best thing happened, much to my relief - HIS ped answered the phone. In we went right away .... again, to my relief, and S's, Dr. McG was calm (so not surprising) and felt that is was PERIorbital and his eye itself was fine, good movement, good vision, and the infection looked like it was oral antibiotic ready.
The likely culprit was his own hands .... when he went to the nurse for his "itchy" eye, he was consistently rubbing what was probably nothing. Nerves from the wounded heart probably caused him to perseverate with the scratching of the *nothing* that was there, and he left a germ or two on his skin turning into an infection.
His poor heart. :-(
Back to today ..... so, we went to the pharmacy, got the meds (holy smokes .... these are antibiotics different than what we've seen before! $246.00... thank goodness for prescription and medical insurance, the copay was far, far cheaper!) and we are now home .... C wanted to go to school to say hi to the teacher, grab his spelling quiz so that I could give it to him at home, and turn in his homework. This is his first and only absence from school ever, so not going likely felt odd for sure .....
He saw his posse, and of course, they were very attentive to him - "please C, please stay, dude!" :o) How cute is that? But he didn't want to stay ... so we're hanging out playing some games, and getting ready to make peanut butter kiss cookies.
So, send us your get well vibes, if you have any extra just hanging around ... we'll be hoping that is stays PERIorbital and just goes quickly away ....
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